L Life has a way of carrying us off in directions we never intended or to places in our minds where the real person lives and longs to be allowed to shine. Living a lie day in and day out is soul-crushing, and it will put you in the ground having lived an inauthentic life.
It is the biggest regret of the dying—to wish they had lived a life true to themselves and not the life others expected. Those expectations start young, often before you learn to walk. A parent or guardian will let you know who they need you to be for them, and the message is to stay on script.
One of the biggest struggles I’ve had as a man has been the struggle to be me and to make sure it’s me who shows up. Because let’s face it, you won’t heal from your past if you’re not in the room.
So how do you become a more grounded, true-to-yourself person? Small steps turn into big ones, so it’s a little-at-a-time voyage. My path started in a coffee shop in Halifax, while on a first date. She came along right when I had to tell someone I just want to be loved for being myself. We agreed then to be as authentic and real with each other as possible and just see what happens. That was in 2007.
Today, I’m living proof that if you fall in love with the right person, you’ll fall in love with yourself too.
Loving yourself makes living a life you’ll regret less likely, and living inside that feeling is the best defense there is to protect you from a life not true to you. Never lie to yourself; it’s the worst thing you can do.
“The privilege of a lifetime is to become who you truly are.”
Carl Jung, Swiss Psychiatrist
